You are there in my mind when I close my eyes late at night; sometimes while I sleep I can see you and smell your sweet scent of cologne . I remember going up to the Bay department store into the cosmetics section. We were like giddy little school girls ; trying all the samples of colognes set up on the counter. You ended up loving the scent of Armani Code .
I wake up and you're there ; almost like you woke up beside me. I know sometimes I focus so much on that I don't open my eyes, mind or heart to anyone else that may have the love for me; that I seek,want and still need in my life. I don't remember what attracted me to you in the first place. When I try backing away to distance myself from you ; something draws me back. As beautiful as your eyes are; there is something there ;something that haunts me, wanting me to know more about you. I can't hear enough of your stories or seeing you smile or let out that contagious laugh of yours. You made me smile so many times ; times I felt like crying. You are something like no one I have ever met .
The Friday that you came here and picked up your few things was hard on me and you knew it was. I helped you carry your things down to the truck. I handed the to you ;without making eye contact . I knew that once I looked into your soulful blue eyes I would break down and you knew that too. You gave me ahug like you always did and told me that you loved me. It was like my fingers had sunk deeper into your shoulder muscles and I couldn't and didn't want to let go. You lifted up my chin;looked into my eyes and asked me "Are you going to be okay Joe ?" I remember answering him ;simply "I have to be "
I went back up to my apartment . I couldn't watch the truck pull away . I slept; soaking my pillow with the tears . I know you loved me and I feel that you still do . The last text I recieved from you said " Good Night Joe -Sweet Dreams-I love you "
Since that last text months ago ; I have learned that he didn't know how to accept the love I had and still have for him . When someone loves someone; it should be unconditional . Mine was for him.
Even now; when I see and think of who I am writing about ; I see your face on the paper as I write this . You knew I loved to write and you pushed me to write when I was ready to give it up . For that ; and so much more I love you . Unconditionally.
I wake up and you're there ; almost like you woke up beside me. I know sometimes I focus so much on that I don't open my eyes, mind or heart to anyone else that may have the love for me; that I seek,want and still need in my life. I don't remember what attracted me to you in the first place. When I try backing away to distance myself from you ; something draws me back. As beautiful as your eyes are; there is something there ;something that haunts me, wanting me to know more about you. I can't hear enough of your stories or seeing you smile or let out that contagious laugh of yours. You made me smile so many times ; times I felt like crying. You are something like no one I have ever met .
The Friday that you came here and picked up your few things was hard on me and you knew it was. I helped you carry your things down to the truck. I handed the to you ;without making eye contact . I knew that once I looked into your soulful blue eyes I would break down and you knew that too. You gave me ahug like you always did and told me that you loved me. It was like my fingers had sunk deeper into your shoulder muscles and I couldn't and didn't want to let go. You lifted up my chin;looked into my eyes and asked me "Are you going to be okay Joe ?" I remember answering him ;simply "I have to be "
I went back up to my apartment . I couldn't watch the truck pull away . I slept; soaking my pillow with the tears . I know you loved me and I feel that you still do . The last text I recieved from you said " Good Night Joe -Sweet Dreams-I love you "
Since that last text months ago ; I have learned that he didn't know how to accept the love I had and still have for him . When someone loves someone; it should be unconditional . Mine was for him.
Even now; when I see and think of who I am writing about ; I see your face on the paper as I write this . You knew I loved to write and you pushed me to write when I was ready to give it up . For that ; and so much more I love you . Unconditionally.
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